The Random Interviews
by ikuto anime love
Summary: Fang and i host random interviews with random people.
1. The Rules

THE RANDOM INTERVIEWS

Yo, hey it's me Kitty Monster. I'm going to host The Random interviews with the help of Fang, from Maximum Ride. The rules explain a lot more.

Okay, first of all I choose the questions and the people being interviewed. I might take some suggestions from fans if they fit the rules.

RULES:

You MUST tell me (a.) who the person is

(b.) what the question is

(c.) if the person is from a book movie etc. you must tell me

what it is they are from

I can also do celebrities if you tell me (1.) their name (2.) their job (3.) their most famous role (if they are an actor or an actress)

Things that are forbidden (a.) questions like "are you gay?" and "who do you

like?"

(b.) cuss words/bad words

(c.) making people do things like "kiss so-and-so"

4. Questions must be interview questions that can be answered and do not require an action except talking

5. Questions must be appropriate. Remember this is rated K+.

6. Be funny. Ask random questions. I like that.

I can interview anyone from Elmo to Obama. I just have to know who the person is. I can do manga people, Pokémon and pretty much anything else. If they are a celebrity and they are not American or they don't do stuff in America I probably won't know who they are. I will try if to eventually get to your question or person if I know who they are. I will tell you if I don't know the person. If will only ask questions that follow the rules. I can post a list of some things I will take people from if you guys would like. Just let me know.

I will not continue this story without reviews. Remember to review.

Last, but not least, if you don't like one of the answers I make a person give I'm sorry. But remember this is supposed to be funny so I probably make some people seem stupid. If have a problem with that then I am sorry but please don't be mad.


	2. Authors Note

Hey, people I really want to know what you think of the idea for this story. Please review and tell me. If you actually want me to do this story please review and tell me so. Also I cannot actually start this story for real unless you guys tell me what to do for the next chapter. This story depends on reviews. I am not trying to force you to review I just want to know what you guys think of the idea and if you like the idea who the chapters should be about. How fast I update this depends entirely on the reviews I get. If enough people don't like the idea I will delete this story.

Thanks,

Kitty Monster.


	3. Chapter 3

Hey peoples its me, Kitty Monster. Really sorry I haven't been updating but the laptop is being stupid and I don't like regular computer key boards. I promise I am going to update my stories soon. Please forgive me.


	4. Seth Clearwater gets interviewed

Kitty Monster: Here we have the first interview of The Randim Interviews. I'm sorry if it doesnt make much sense, I am kind of crazy and random and weird.

Fang: Yep, you're crazy alright. Like wacko, scary crazy.

Kitty Monster: Am not! Well, I am now ignoring Fang so I can talk again. I have random thoughts so I am just going to write what I'm thinking and you better deal with it. So, Fang would you like to tell everybody who we are interviewing today?

Fang: Sure. Today on The Random Interviews we are having Seth Clearwater from Twilight. And maybe other people too, cause I don't control what Kitty Monster writes.

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own Twilight, Maximum Ride.

Fang:**bold, **Seth:underlined

Interview #1: Seth Clearwater

**I know that werewolves don't like vampires but if you had to pick your favorite vampire who would it be?**

My answer will probably surprise a lot of people but I think my favorite vampire would have to be Victoria. I don't know why I like Victoria so much but I do. I didn't want to help kill her but I didn't want her to kill Bella so I pitched in to help. 

**Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, okay then Seth. That was unexpected. So tell us more about it.**

Oooooooh, once after we killed her I thought I saw her again and so did Edward. He and I made a bet that I couldn't interview her with out getting hurt (he wasnt going to let me get killed) but I thought that I could do it. I was right! I put it on YouTube to prove that vampires and werewolves could at least, sorta get along. Hey you're probably wondering how I interviewd a dead vampire but even I am not exactly sure how I did that. You can even ask Edward, I really did do it though. It was so fun! 

**, that's weird Seth. I don't know how you did it either but I am not going to ask. Um, time for a new question. Do you like to chase squirrels? i was wondering if you did because you know dogs like chasing squirrels and you guys are like dog people. Oh, wow, I'm talking as much as Nudge. It's a disaster! Um, yeah I'm gonna let you answer now.**

No, I don't really like to chase squirrels but I think Jacob and Paul do. I prefer birds and cats myself. I also have an odd obsession with polar bears but i've never actually met one and I don't think I'd want to chase one either.

Jacob: I do not chase squirrels! Oooh, look a squirrel! *runs away and chases squirrel*

**Does anybody know how he got here? I don't. Oh well, I guess i should ask you another question now. Do you-**

No, I actually don't like pie! Why does everybody ask me that?

**I wasn't going to ask that but thank you for answering anyways. I was going to ask if you liked bacon. So do you like bacon?**

No, I don't like bacon. I am a vegetarian werewolf! I can't stand how mean they are to the poor little cute animals that have never done anything wrong.

**I thought you liked cats and birds.**

I do, but i only like to chase them, not eat them. 

**I didn't know that werewolves could be vegetarians. I would expect that being wolfish would make you like meat more because wolves are carnivores aren't they? **

Why does eveybody find it so weird that I'm a vegetarian werewolf? It's not like I find it weird that you have freaking wings for crying out loud! And i should find that weird because people aren't supposed to have wings!

**Blame the School, not me. I didn't ask for wings you know. You have no idea how many times I've wished I didn't have wings so that I could be a normal teenager. What is your favorite part about being a werewolf? **

My favorite part about being a werewolf is that I get to turn into a wolf! You have no idea how much I dreamt about being able to turn into a wolf when I was little! It's like a dream come true.

**That's cool, i guess. My favorite part about being a birdkid is-**

Kitty Monster: No one cares Fang! We aren't here to read about you, we are here to read about your interview with Seth. So stop talking about yourself and start asking Seth questions! Okay, Fang?

**Yes Kitty Monster. I understand. Please don't yell at me. I don't like being yelled at, I mean like I really, really don't like being yelled at.**

Kitty Monster: FANG! You're doing it again!

**Sorry. Um, I'm all out of questions. So bye Seth.**

Bye, Fang! 

Kitty Monster: People please remeber that if you want the real answers to these questions you should probably go ask Stephanie Meyer. I don't know the real answers. Please review. I want to know if any of you think I'm as crazy as Fang thinks I am and oh yeah, i want to know what you thought of my story too.


	5. interviewing angel

Kitty Monster: Okay, I get a lot of views for this story so I think people like it. Okay, I hope you guys like it.

Fang: We're back! I know you guys missed us or at least you missed me. I at least am too awesome to not miss.

Kitty Monster: Okay I am not sure how this interview is going to go. I really was out of ideas today but I was really bored and had nothing else to do.

Fang: Okay, no one cares about your life so are we going to get on with the interview or not?

Kitty Monster: Fine you big poopie head.

Kitty Monster and Fang: This time on The Random Interviews we are having Angel as our guest. This is going to be an interesting interview.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Fang, Angel, Nudge, The Amazing Race, Pokemon, Johnny Depp, or any of the other crap I talked about in this story.

Fang: Hello, as I'm sure you all know my name is Fang. Today I am going to be interviewing a very sweet young girl named Angel.

Angel: They kind of already knew that Fang.

Fang: It's my job to say it again. So first question do you like-

Angel: No, I don't like brussel sprouts Fang. (ha-ha)

Fang: For a mind reader you kind of fail. That is totally not the question I was going to ask you.

Angel: Did you not hear me laugh after I said that?

Fang: No, no I didn't hear you laugh. So are you going to answer the question I was going to ask or not?

Angel: If I have to. Yeah, I guess I do have to since you are going to make me do it. The answer is yes, I do like to watch The Amazing Race. No, yes, no, potatoes, well duh-

Fang: Answer one question at a time please Angel. So you do like The Amazing Race. Next question, do you play-

Angel: Do I look like I play Pokemon? How the heck do you think I got a game system to play it on? So, no I don't play Pokemon you stupid idiot.

Fang: Well then, you don't have to yell at me. Do you find Nudge-

Angel: Doesn't everybody find Nudge annoying? I mean, sure she's a sweet girl and all but she is really annoying when she won't shut up. And the answers to the next questions are no, I like Johnny Depp better, potatoes are my favorite vegetable and well duh I like bacon.

Fang: Thank you for answering those questions, but next time would you please let me ask the question completely?

Angel: Why do you have to take the fun out of everything?

Fang: Because I can. So the next question is which version of Alice in  
Wonderland is your favorite? The one with Johnny Depp or the original animated one by Disney?

Angel: The one with Johnny Depp definitly. The other one is cool but you just can't beat Johnny Depp.

Fang: You really like that Johnny Depp don't you? So the next question is what is your favorite-

Angel: A bird is my favorite animal because I get my DNA that gives me wings and such from them.

Fang: I thought you said you' d let me ask the question completely.

Angel: I agreed to do it one time and that was it. You never mentioned anything about doing it after that and I definitely didn't agree to it.

Fang: Angel you are so annoying. I can't take anymore of you're dumb games. I'm not Nudge or Gazzy who will take it with a smile and kind of enjoy it.

Angel: Interviews over then. Come get me and make me stop Fang. *flies off*

Fang: ANGEL! Get back here you! *flies off after Angel*

Kitty Monster: Okay then. That was interesting and kind of funny. Well see you guys next time. p.s. I don't know the real answers to these questions so if you want them go ask James Patterson.

R&R please


	6. Fang interviews himself

Hey it's me again. I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while I just couldn't come up with a good person to interview. I was also kind of sad because all though a lot of people read my stories no one was reviewing so I didn't feel like updating. I am sorry but I would really like to get reviews for my work. I know I sound like a pain in the butt but it really bugs me how I like never get reviews but a lot of people read my stories.

Fang: Shut up would you? You're being really annoying.

Kitty Monster: Fine you meanie face. So are you going to tell them who you are going to be interviewing or should I do it?

Fang: I will do it. This time on The Random Interviews I will be interviewing myself. I really don't want to have to this but she is making me do it. She was seriously out of inspiration for people to interview.

Kitty Monster: To make this as much as we can like a real two person interview Fang is going to be sitting across from a mirror. This is going to be such a funny interview.

Fang: Disclaimer time!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Fang or the rest of the Flock. I am not a dude. And my last name is definitely not Patterson. So there is no way I could own them. I wish just like everyone else that I did though.

Yo hey it's Fang. I will be your host today on The Random Interviews. I am going to be interviewing myself today. I am being forced to. Please don't think that I normally talk to myself like a weirdo. I am not a weirdo just a little quieter than most people (normally at least. I have to talk way too much today.)

Okay Fang, are you ready for the first question?

Why yes Fang, yes I am.

Okay, the first question of the day is what is your favorite color?

Well, you see Fang the answer to that question would have to be black. I thought everyone knew that with how I always wear black, but oh well I guess people are dumber than they look.

Fang, be nice to the readers please or we could both get hit upside the head for being mean. Okay the next question is have you ever thought about what birds they got the DNA for you guys from? Because you all have like different colored wings and Dylan's wings were a bit different from you guys'.

Wow, that was a long question Fang. Um, I think Max might have but I'm pretty sure that I never really thought about it. I think Dylan's wings might be Hawk or something**. (A/N: I'm pretty sure that is what Max said in the book. If it is not could someone please** **tell me so I can fix it?)** But I never really thought about everyone else's. I never really cared either.

Interesting. Then could you tell me right now what you birds' DNA you think everyone else might have? Oh my gosh, I sound like such an idiot talking to myself right now. Oh well it's not like I really have a choice.

Um, you do sound stupid talking to yourself Fang. I think Angels' wings might be a dove or a swan or some other kind of white bird like that. I don't want to say this but I think mine might be like a raven or a crow or some other type of black bird. **(A/N: I** **forgot what everyone else's wings look like. I feel so pathetic. If you can tell me I would really appreciate it. When someone tells me I will add in one for that person they told me about. If you think another bird is more reasonable for Angel or Fang please tell me which bird and why you think that. If I agree I will probably change it to that because I honestly have absolutely no clue in what they really might be. I just guess by the color.)**

Thank you for your answer Fang. I really appreciate it. Okay, the next question is has a dog or cat ever tried to chase you? You know, because they chase birds and you guys are like birds basically.

Fang why are you talking like that? You keep talking like I am a different person than you and like you're not part of the Flock anymore.

Because, Fang I have to read this stupid script when I read the questions. It is so annoying. So are you going to answer the question now?

Fine. I will answer the dumb question now. Well technically, I've never been chased by a dog unless you count the Erasers. They are much worse than a regular dog because they are much scarier and more dangerous and not to mention trying to kill you. But, no a cat has but never tried to chase me or any other member of the Flock.

Thank you so very much for answering the question Fang. You are such a wonderful, awesome person.

I agree Fang. I totally agree with you on that. Hey are you going to ask me any more questions?

Yeah, I guess I will ask more questions now. So self, do you like bacon or ham more? Please think carefully about your answer because this is a very, very serious question.

After much thought, I would have to say I like them both equally. That is because they are both better than what we eat when we're on the run. When I get the chance to eat either one I am in Meat Heaven. I love them both equally. Thank you so much Fang for finally asking a really good question.

You're welcome Fang. I do think all the questions so far have been kind of weird don't you think so Fang?

I totally agree with you on this one Fang. These are some of the weirdest questions I have ever heard anyone ask someone else. Although technically you're not asking someone else. You're asking yourself and all but you get the point, right?

Yeah I get the point. Okay we have three more questions left and then we can say goodbye and I can stop talking to myself. So let's begin. Has anyone ever thought that you were a ninja? You know, like because of all the black and the mad fighting skills.

Um, no. I have never before been mistaken for a ninja. 'Cause you know, most ninjas like _don't have wings._ And in case none of you have noticed I _do_ have wings. Although I can't figure out why you wouldn't notice that I have wings because they are kind of really hard to miss unless you're like blind or something. No offense Iggy!

Iggy: None taken! *randomly disappears again*

Ahhhh, how the cracker did you get in here? Hey where did he go? Neh, who cares? Okay Fang, back to the interview now.

Okay! We have two questions left. The next one is have you ever had a dream about a Barbie doll?

Wtc? **(A/N: what the cracker)** I might have had a dream about a Barbie but you'll never find out now will you?

Yeah I will. I am you remember? I know everything you know duh.

Fine, I'll tell you! I had a dream about a murderous Barbie doll once when I was like 10. Angel had just gotten a Barbie as a present and that thing was really creepy. In my dream it was trying to kill me with a fork. It was the scariest dream I've ever had in my entire life.

Um, that is really pathetic Fang. I don't remember ever having that oh yes I do. You're right it _was_ scary. Okay last question. I warn you this is the dumbest question on this list. What is your name? I told you it was a really dumb question.

My name is Fang. We're done now goodbye all you lovely peoples.

I am really sorry that Fang was totally OOC. Remember, if you would like the real answers to these questions then go ask James Patterson. He actually knows the answers. I on the other hand do not know them.

R&R please


End file.
